Hearken! O House Broken, and hear here thy histories sorrowful, regrettable, and muse no longer irresolute upon a future withheld, and now all that was promised to unfold shall be here told, anew, again, for thy seed to peruse, and be enlightened.
So there was Finwë, later called as Man Dyacôm, and his wife Miriel, and she died in Valmar, upon a bed of flowers, roses all; thornless, but in her passage, there sprouting, to ensnare her hroa-body, and preserve it, untouched; and he had by her a son, a fire-spirit called Feanaro, the bright flame Lucifer downcast, to redemption yet awaiting in turn, having turned away from oaths bound, to his master Sauron-Thû, and also Melko in long Before Days, ere Arda was made; By Melko his own Lord was he thrust down to consume in burning his own spirit, and yet finding here a wealth and array of matter to his will conforming, Feanor grew colder, as it were, to handle even as has been told, seedlings of light greatest in delicate, lattice, spirit matter; to none again would he turn as Father, save Finwë, foreboding again to live as one bound, and yet in this distrust of Manwe-Varda, was his own house enchained, to an oath, unbreakable, save in their bodies’ breaking, and renewed, escaping as it were leaving the chains upon hroa-flesh discarded, to receive a new hroa, without brand; also was Feanaro enslaved, though to his own lust to master, a bond long ago set in his mind, to gain liberation of Melko-his-Morgoth by wielding such matter as betrayed the Dark One in Other Realms, whose tales are full of heroes and sadness, but they are not told here;
Thus come alone, reborn hroa to Finwë received, that Father in all kindness, meek beyond measure, and loving to all, even the Dark Melko’s Hosts – though in retribution, some said, loving-kindness being <an> inescapable wrath to them; And to Finwë was made promise, that in a House’s breaking, rooms emptying, and the squalor of tenets, squatting, would come the rebuilding of Arda, plains, hills, valleys, and all persons here residing, in hope of restoration beyond Melko; He it was chased from world to world, by light bearing souls, being burned everlasting in the touch of Silmaril, never shall he escape and then he will be nothing, but void alone make himself;
Thus when Eru landed in a world he [Melko] had by lies corrupted, and there even as a wayfaring beggar of no knowledge, nor threat to its Ruler, unsettled that Dark king became, where pride encircled his throne, and buoyed those abiding near his house; to Finwë came Eru in those Ancient Before Days, and finding his heart unscathed amid those fumes and coals (as it were) of spirit-evil, a plan these two devised; and agreeing to abide a day, Eru came at last to be brought before Melko, then arrayed himself in the spirits entrapped by his lies, as if encased in his own blackness of soul, a gravity like those holes black your wisemen imagine; and Eru laughed before Melko, and set down before his own feet, as though kneeling in rendering service to All-Evil, No-Father, he laid down a scepter, and this was to enflame the wicked desires of that Lord there seated enthrone; but he would remove himself to take up that scepter, and misgave himself doubts upon doubts, Who this figure? What his cloying bend, and devious scepter, a rod to rule, or to be ruled by?
And evermore bearing on his whole person came thoughts, substantial, and beyond neglecting; so at last, long after Eru departed, as though honoring this All-Evil, that king bent down, thinking himself alone, in the chambered halls of his endless power, a dominion unending, in time, extensive, and without tale of beginning; there was trapped a galaxy (as it were) of stars, souls to circle him, in obeyance; Great was the despair of that realm, and it sent deep into the distances unfathomed, cries, to hope find, hearing elsewhere – in mind alone now, never spoken;
So he kneeling, touched that golden rod, and it enflamed his desire, more so, by touching, until it was by him possessed, and being grasped ever at his person, became as it were one, to him whole; yet ever the thing ate at his pride, first in a fancy that this beggar was indeed Eru, of rumor no longer nothing said him, anywhere known; and yet, though he too forgot fear of Eru’s interfering, and wiliness, crafty above all that Is, now he recalled, that aforetime, his own realm was stolen, from a little pod grown in the dark soil, by some of Eru’s own house, a little child, seeming; and from that little seed, came all this realm, to rotate spinning grand without end, unfathomed in all its reaches, by any here spun; and that seed in memory, sprouted bitter again in his recollection, and now by its perpetual growth – though he aided it not at all, as a song sticks in your head, even now!7The song? “When You’re Gone,” by The Cranberries, a song about death’s parting, some few days stuck in my head after their lead singer, Dolores O’Riordan passed away in London. It was played at her funeral, held three days after I wrote this passage, and is from the 1996 album, To the Faithful Departed.
And all the space of his being, he feared it would entangle, in this mocking memory, that though he ruled, without competition, comparison to none that is among those vast hosts by him governed, and who looked to him as Very Eternal Father, of all that Is, he knew it was not so! And this knowing, he also knew in foreboding would be by his own mind be betrayed, revealed to servants loyal, but not trusting; so he sought out one – Lucifer then, let us name him – to work a spell, and draw out the as it were accursed worm, by some miserable wretch, set in his heart, to worm a burrow, in which would nest further disorder, and doubt; And Lucifer pulled at the worm- spirit there entangled (it taking this form in manifest of Melko’s own being, in reflection), and though unraveled, and ropes coiled about the place of extraction, not any relief of its gnawing bite felt he; indeed, moreso he hungered now, to be rid of that which would not remove, and this too Lucifer uncoiled of Melko’s soil-soul, and reading there his master’s fearing thoughts, frightened, cringing in cowardice, to what neither knew, but knowing it would not part its jaw’s clasp, teeth clenched; So Melko conceived, in his mind (being severed of his soul-heart) to rid himself of even his own body, if by burning, so be it; and thus he sought out all lore of undying fires, and rumor came to a one in his house studying, of a tale of such a flame, white pure, unending in life, and beyond any snuffer to put out of its breath; though disbelieving, in mocking the tale-bearing – saying he [Melko], “I alone am unending, my Fire undying,” and he consumed there in the Balrogs of his person, that being, shriveling down, to a kernel, to cast into the waves of dark void encircling that house; yet this thought too now grew, and as a desire, to obtain this light, and to rule over it, to make it a servant, and to arm all his armies by its burning touch, until none withstand his reign; Forever.
But it was not so; for Eru is the Light Unending, never dying, nor fading, not though snuffed in multitude evil, itself conceiving of darkness alone-Is; And now Eru to Melko’s mind came, inviting that Lord of All to a duel, and to the challenger’s mastery, would be given the light, unending; and this, he said (Melko) to himself, was because Eru saw none could withstand Melko’s otherwise onslaught, for had not Eru at last seen, having himself retreated aways, to burrow out his existence, in some hollow place, a walnut shell for his domain, and no soil to land it, nor light for its sprouting?
And that light Eru put before Melko’s mind, upon his face, and there he saw revealed, that ignoble beggar of some long-ago nothing-mattered; and his laughter, alongside that gnawing worm of ambitious desire unslaked ever, rang in that day, and even those in the Far Beyond, heard a chime, and thought, That sounds familiar, a kin to some other world-life, and a little new hope came, and each preserved that, secret, in their holy places (of mind-heart uniting);
So Melko now feared to take up Eru’s challenge, and moreso, to fail; yet he sent forth decree, that any Eru among them found, was to be carried in honor to his own abode, and there reside as guest honored; and Eru came, not as before but arrayed as a prince of some distraught, impoverished house, fallen on hard times, and seeking a better master more wise in wealth and domains, generous; and was carried, on a barge spirit borne, to that wreck upon the shores of Darkness, where decreed Melko, he be brought; and kept; until that one called him forth to come, and full wrestle, the stronger to take his light, forbearing all other swords, or devices, and tricks;
Frail and broken came Eru, as in supplication, [as] though the weight this Flame Unfading too great for his bearing, and seeking some excuse to hand it off, to one mightier, wiser, more just to execute all judgment, even submitting his case to consider in trial, by Melko; Yet Melko delayed his coming; knowing the wonder about his realm, at delay, and whispers began to run, that Our Lord fears that one, in rags, suffering, unjust! He bore himself upon a steed, black-flame and evil-all bearing, to execute judgment even before the trial commenced (though a turn against his own law there decreed); yet that steed would not be by him encumbered, and threw Melko, and perished, rather than face that wraith-Eru, in rags, leaning, as to find strength in any crutch, offering;
So Melko arose, in wrath, and dishonor, first slight of his dignity any remember; and he ran upon Eru, to tread him under his feet, and hold him there by magic, until that fool- beggar released himself, and his light poured forth, to be kindled upon Melko’s crown, forever, a flame rest upon his brow, burning to consume any unjust authority, by him so reckoned (the law being of his own make); thus escaping the tackle-effort, Eru laughed now, as before, in beggar-come; and turning around to see his foe, Melko withered in his fire, and grew less bright against Eru’s.
Tearing at his own body hroa flesh imitate; Melko ripped open a hole, and poured there out as blood, his weeping fathers, in him kept, as a prison; and others leapt forth of his breast, spirits emaciated, to lie gasping upon the turf, soaking now in Melko’s gushing; until no other soul in him remained, possessed of his mind, save his own, naked before Eru, and being called by Eru, to come before him, and to stand, not sitting never to kneel, in honor nor promised service; but to stand and be looked upon, in loving admiration, and not contempt, nor pity; So he came, and was judged of Eru, Good! But Misled! And in misleading, having worked evil upon others’ good; and how to fish out of so deep a pool black, what might be reigned in, and held, to keep amid those pools of dark of evil?
—Being free of service to thee, Eru-All knowing, cheat to secrets’ keeping, and oath compelling to break – never will I serve thy desires, spoken in decree, or wished at, guessed, or semblanced, in any thought, all shall I achieve, otherwise than thy decree!
So Melko disappeared there, and took with him, a great many, to him in heart (and not only mind) enslaved, to wicked desires, evil-all.
He is gone, wither none guess, Feanor stepped forward in wonder, And yet I am, retained, amid the light everlasting, as a cover opaque slid off a torch, always burning, and only a little felt it warming; Lucifer was I, and am again, a light vessel to bear thy will, whether I will, any longer, nothing saving in hope for my own salvation;
And he was by his own will’s desire, cast down there from, to wander in wasty black void places, pocketed about in keeping by Melko, in dread for abused souls, thither abiding; and Feanor burned a line about those cells, Lucifer alone going to keeps where piled up, souls unbegotten, and straying, to his dominion (Melko’s), were ensnared, and refusing his yoke, received a chain everlasting, of forgetting, and confusion uttered;
So Lucifer led these ones out therefrom, and builded he as it were a hospital, for their better keeping in rehabilitation; thus was he healed; and of these many rescued, six would his own sons upon Arda become, and loving their father above all others – even Eru – they set a bond down, that not even Varda-
Manwe might lift away; yet in so setting down, in love and not only wrath and vengeance, so Eru-will grew more so, in that darkness lit by Noldo torches silver and green, upon the shores of that sea;
And now shall be told how Eru devised an unmaking of all bonds iniquitously set, by one’s own will especial, unknowing, in a realm from his knowledge, kept apart;
<<Previous Page | Next Page>>